[ "uncertain" is a good word for how emma still feels about it all. she's usually so quick to know exactly what she wants, and she's absolutely one to make up her mind and stick to her guns, but...this is uncharted territory for her. she's never had to deal with emotions that she couldn't just rein right in, control when she needs to, and— move beyond.
it's awful hard to move on from it all with the constant reminders and discomfort, and then— this. this perfect wholeness that wraps itself around her as soon as she's anywhere near faraday.
where before she'd been faced with her own anger and feelings of displacement and betrayal (because faraday is by no means matthew, and that still niggles somewhere in the back of her mind), she's now been confronted with unease and almost fear.
what if they truly aren't compatible? what if their lives and who they are is so wildly different that there's no way to reconcile it between them?
what if the universe made a mistake?
she has no concrete answers, and that scares her. but what she does know is that faraday makes her feel things she didn't even think possible, and what they'd gone through together in rose creek truly is significant to her — something defining and powerful. she knows that all of that is important.
and that makes faraday important.
she presses a hand over the tingling mark on her arm, squeezing just a touch. ]
...I can't say as I'm very fond of that particular idea anymore.
[ so...no? she thinks she really has settled heartily on the side of wanting him to stay.
she just hasn't worked out the logistics or the capacity she wants him there. ]
no subject
it's awful hard to move on from it all with the constant reminders and discomfort, and then— this. this perfect wholeness that wraps itself around her as soon as she's anywhere near faraday.
where before she'd been faced with her own anger and feelings of displacement and betrayal (because faraday is by no means matthew, and that still niggles somewhere in the back of her mind), she's now been confronted with unease and almost fear.
what if they truly aren't compatible? what if their lives and who they are is so wildly different that there's no way to reconcile it between them?
what if the universe made a mistake?
she has no concrete answers, and that scares her. but what she does know is that faraday makes her feel things she didn't even think possible, and what they'd gone through together in rose creek truly is significant to her — something defining and powerful. she knows that all of that is important.
and that makes faraday important.
she presses a hand over the tingling mark on her arm, squeezing just a touch. ]
...I can't say as I'm very fond of that particular idea anymore.
[ so...no? she thinks she really has settled heartily on the side of wanting him to stay.
she just hasn't worked out the logistics or the capacity she wants him there. ]